A roll of the eyes and a shake of the head
Are a poetic punmaker’s butter and bread
The louder the groaning the broader my grin
My loonyVerse beckons: why wait?

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Winner of the July 2024 Poem of the Month Competition on poetry.com

They Say that I … How’s Your Mom?
or
I Got Distracted Trying to Think of a Subtitle…

They say that I have A.D.D.
Attention Defi… Hey a bee!
It isn’t true, I’m not like that
I’m focused perfec… Wow! a cat!
I don’t know why they mock me so
There’s nothing wrong with… Hi there, Joe!
I’ll get revenge, I’ll cause them pain
They’ll wish they’d nev… Look, look! A plane!

From now on I will concentrate
Mmmm… squash or cordial… No. Wait.
Breathe deeply … one thing at a time
The time? It’s one o’clock and I’m
So hungry I … oh what the heck
This poem is a total wreck
To prove I’m not a hopeless twit
I got my wife to finish it

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Poem of the day…

This One’s a Fabrication

Can I pull the wool over your eyes?
Will you cotton on to my stunt?
’Twill be a surprise if you get it
’Cos denim is mined back to front

He Could Be In a Stew

The sheepdog, tired of work said, “I
Could live much better in the sty
I’d lie all day in mud and sleep
And never see another sheep!”

He Didn’t Know What Was Cooking

Did you ever see anything zanier
Than these marsupials from Tasmania?
They sit on their haunches
And thrust out their paunches
With snouts that a crowd o’