A roll of the eyes and a shake of the head
Are a poetic punmaker’s butter and bread
The louder the groaning the broader my grin
My loonyVerse beckons: why wait?

Come on in!

Download A Pun in the Oven for FREE and get Punny Wise Sounds Foolish for FREE.

Winner of the July 2024 Poem of the Month Competition on poetry.com

They Say that I … How’s Your Mom?
or
I Got Distracted Trying to Think of a Subtitle…

They say that I have A.D.D.
Attention Defi… Hey a bee!
It isn’t true, I’m not like that
I’m focused perfec… Wow! a cat!
I don’t know why they mock me so
There’s nothing wrong with… Hi there, Joe!
I’ll get revenge, I’ll cause them pain
They’ll wish they’d nev… Look, look! A plane!

From now on I will concentrate
Mmmm… squash or cordial… No. Wait.
Breathe deeply … one thing at a time
The time? It’s one o’clock and I’m
So hungry I … oh what the heck
This poem is a total wreck
To prove I’m not a hopeless twit
I got my wife to finish it

Purchase the Books

Read them on any

device in the kindle app

Poem of the day…

271½ Grams of 2p Rice

Diesel the weasel was shuffling uneasil-
y, talking on one of those fop shows
The host said, “Hey Diesel – strange name for a weasel”
He answered, “It’s better than ‘Pop Goes’”

I Could have Called Him Acne

Mel asked me, “Why’s your dog’s name Spot?
It should be Tar or Pitch instead!”
I answered, “I hear that a lot –
You see … he has a big black head.”

He Lives in Shorance

thieves broke in and stole my stuff
That would be turbulently tough
And so I’ve summoned to my place
Insurance salesman Justin Case