A roll of the eyes and a shake of the head
Are a poetic punmaker’s butter and bread
The louder the groaning the broader my grin
My loonyVerse beckons: why wait?

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Winner of the July 2024 Poem of the Month Competition on poetry.com

They Say that I … How’s Your Mom?
or
I Got Distracted Trying to Think of a Subtitle…

They say that I have A.D.D.
Attention Defi… Hey a bee!
It isn’t true, I’m not like that
I’m focused perfec… Wow! a cat!
I don’t know why they mock me so
There’s nothing wrong with… Hi there, Joe!
I’ll get revenge, I’ll cause them pain
They’ll wish they’d nev… Look, look! A plane!

From now on I will concentrate
Mmmm… squash or cordial… No. Wait.
Breathe deeply … one thing at a time
The time? It’s one o’clock and I’m
So hungry I … oh what the heck
This poem is a total wreck
To prove I’m not a hopeless twit
I got my wife to finish it

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Poem of the day…

Were They Beef Pies?

McTavish played the bagpipes
And he played them very badly
All those who ever heard him would
Vituperate him madly

Caught in the Courtin’

The average wife loves the hard-working life
She smiles when he leaves all the chores for her
Why! she only got wed to put sheets on his bed
And to stop him from opening doors for her

Does He Wear Dungarees?

The beetle, black and very small,
Rolls dung into a little ball
I wouldn’t have the wherewithal
To do the beetle’s job at all