Poems Archive
She Only Wallows in Mud at the Spa
Harriet the hippopotamus
Sailed off on a shippopotamus
Going on a trippopotamus
Bought it cheap – a snippopotamus
Behind Every Successful Myth Is A Woman
Mrs Claus, fed up one day
Complained, “I’ve had enough!
You’re jolly in the grotto, but
With me you’re always gruff
His Energy Never Flags
He waltzed around the winger
Struck the striker dumb with skill
Reminiscent of a Pele
Or a Zico from Brazil
They Ran Out of Magnetism
Two residents of Warsaw wed
With nought in common so she fled
So different and cold of heart
It’s clear the two were Poles apart
They Were Talking Bull
The cows went to a moooovie
But they found it quite bemoooosing
The Teenage Mooootant Ninja Turtles –
Not at all amoooosing
The Low-flying Pelican
The pelican flew very low
When landing in the pan
The ducks all dived for cover
When their leader shouted, “Man!”
He Lives in Shorance
thieves broke in and stole my stuff
That would be turbulently tough
And so I’ve summoned to my place
Insurance salesman Justin Case
He Gets Their Seal of Approval
Paul Russ the walrus is Oh! so chivallrous
The girls love his long Arctic nights
He’s courteous and brave
But the thing they most cr
Who Knew He Was Chinese?
The Queen of household cleaners
Wed the famous potter King
Their amorous demeanours
Spawned their offspring Prince Char Ming
If At First You Don’t Suck Seed
Woody the woodpecker started to pout
Fed up with wood-wood-wood day in and day out
“It beggars belief that this life could excite,
I cannot endure it, this bark has no bite!