There’s Nothing Like Self-effacement
I tried to write a poem, trite,
But thoughts profound plagued me all night
As wit and wisdom made me stumble
I wrote, instead, one meek and humble
Hounded Into Submission
The high and lofty eagle
Looks majestic and so regal
But I’m told it is illegal
If you feed one with a beagle
This Is Senseless
A pugilistic hermit crab
By name: Napoleontius
Was knocked clean out his shell one day
No, no, not dead — unconchous
It’s Not Rain, Dear, It’s Mist
(To the tune of the original)
Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer
Visited his therapist
Three times a week he saw him
Three Irish Lumberjacks?
They’ll plane your planes and sand your beech
Your cherry tree they’ll make a peach
They’ll spruce your spruce till it looks fine
And make your stinkwood smell like pine