He Exercises My Patience
Bert bodybuilder is obsessed
With all the muscles in his chest
He struts round topless for publicity
Exhibiting his pec-centricity
They Ran Out of Magnetism
Two residents of Warsaw wed
With nought in common so she fled
So different and cold of heart
It’s clear the two were Poles apart
Home Is Wherever She Is
As a snail I’m never lonely
Company I never lack
With mi cordial compan-i-on
Michelle upon mi back
Lunatick Lunatock
The time-piece on the wall annoyed
The inmates of the mental block
Because the thing was always right
They swapped it for a cuckoo clock
Jaws Unfaithfully
“At last that promotion!” Luigi was thinking
A torch at the end of the warehouse was blinking
The Mafia soon would arrive with their booty
And Sicily’s sergeant was doing his duty
They Put a Bouquet on His Grave
Jake, the drake, was the Lord of the Lake
Who had made all his money in scent
He whipped up a fragrance no duck could resist
And he flogged it wherever he went